Friday, November 24, 2006

Thanksgiving Speech For Bush's Dinner Exclusive Here! Well, Its Sorta True

In a World Exclusive for us at Truthiness Headquarters, we have an extract which may (but more likely is not) from Presdent Bush's Thanksgiving Dinner, here's a portion (of the speech, not the dinner) here :

" I'd like to give thanks to the American People for agreeing with me that they were scared enough to relect me in 2004. I'd like to thank my Daddy for letting all his old pals work for me and giving me advice when I didn't think I needed any anyway. I'd like to thank the Iraqi Courts for sentencing Saddam just before the election, I though it would work, but hey, it never hurt anybody. I'd like to thank my government for persuading the American People about the Weapons Of Mass Destruction in Iraq, which don't exist. I'd like to thank them for believing that there was a connection between Iraq and Al-Qaeda which doesn't exist. Plus for believing it was to bring freedom to Iraq while passing the Patriot Act and Military Comissions Act at home, oh and suspending Habeas Corpus. Thanks for letting me invade Iraq to take revenge on someone for 9/11 and since they weren't connected to it, that's really nice of you, thanks. I'm thankful for being allowed to contain Iraq as a 'rogue state' even though we said earlier that they weren't a threat.

But most of all, I'd like to thank the voters, for letting me get away with all this since 2001 and none of you have caught me out yet. Thanks so much folks. And remember, in America you're free, totally free, to do what we tell you.

Happy Thanksgiving. Now lets have some turkey and tap some phones."

You heard it here first.

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